Girl you better be dating 3 men at the same damn time (ideally without sex) and let me explain why. I know some of y’all might be like OMG I can’t and the other half of y’all are on your hot girl summer ish and ready to take on the challenge. But no matter what side you’re currently on, I want you to just hear out my logic for a sec. Some say dating is like an interview process and that makes perfect sense, but since I’m in love with food I like to think of dating as a visit to a new restaurant.
When you get seated would you like the waiter to bring you a surprise dish and you just deal with what you’ve been served or would you like to see the menu first? Idk about you but ummm BRING ME THE MENU SIR!
I need to see what's in this dish cuz um first of all, I don’t do pork and I have allergies. I am allergic to gluten and fvck boys! See so when you have three meals you get to sample all of them and make a healthy, educated decision. Dating three men at a time is a strategy that will help you decide who to promote and fire accordingly.
So why would a person try to move forward with the first guy that slides in the dm? The answer is desperation. Have you ever gone to a new restaurant starving? Well, it’s the worst! You’re willing to eat almost anything at that point. Don’t be that girl!! I need you to select healthy choices babe. Get pretty for dinner. Take your time and select exactly wtf you desire off the menu. I’m talking the steak and lobster!! Or whatever is your fave meal! Sis have you learned nothing from Goldilocks and the three bears? You need to find the one that’s “just right"!!! Do not settle. Moral to the story is, you deserve to chose who you want to eat it. Haha!!! I hope I get better at this cuz that was terrible but in a very epic way. But anyway, I tried!!! Now go out there put on some lace and make me proud.
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